Protect Your Creativity

We start out with an abundance of creativity, but over time, it seems to fade.  Many of us recognize now that there are actually forces at work against creativity: peer pressure, schools, competitive society, marketing.  And then the more children are exposed to these destructive mediocre-creating ways, the more our creativity is squashed. Without protection, little by little it would be gone.  One of our jobs, as mothers, is to hold the space for our children's creativity to grow and blossom into whatever it needs to be.

Preserving our creativity is vital - it's the basis of all innovation, progress, and growth. That's why, as unschoolers, we found developing creativity to be more important than learning the times tables. Calculators can do that. But inventing or creatively problem-solving? That can only come if your creativity has been nurtured.



I want to share a few really good articles on the subject that I found out on the web:

Why People Secretly Fear Creative Ideas by Jeremy Dean
Jeremy writes the PsyBlog and contends that there are some very human traits that also work against our creative selves. He doesn't say this, but I think it's easy for us to simply blame school for squashing kids' creativity. And, while I think that it does, Jeremy's piece helps us understand that while we might say we want to promote creativity, our actions often show otherwise. Understanding that we have to overcome our bias against that uncomfortable-ness that comes with doing something new. You might see yourself or  others in some of the descriptions he gives. This will help you with conveying the right message to your children, to others, and even to yourself.

How to Become a Creative Genius by Kim Roach
Kim gives six tips for expanding creativity. Keeping a journal on hand to capture those fleeting ideas, imagining conversations, increasing your reading, mind-mapping, to name a few.

How to Instantly Boost Your Creativity and Happiness by Sandra Martini
Sandra encourages us to take 15 minutes to examine what's blocking our personal joy these days. You might be surprised how that can affect your creativity. I found this article on the Creativity for Life, which has a lot of articles to poke around and read.

AHA! Great Moments in Creativity by Mitchell Ditkoff
 Mitchell shares stories of Rene Descartes, founder of the Scientific Method; Elias Howe, inventor of the sewing machine; Richard Wagner and Wolfgang Mozart, exceptional composers; Rudyard Kipling, famous writer;  Tchaikovsky, Nutcracker composer; Kekule, a Flemish molecular scientist. He gives brief little snippets of each of their lives, and how "great creative breakthroughs usually happen only after intense periods of struggle - even madness."

I think we should spend as much time pondering how to protect our children's creativity as we do thinking about educational experiences we would like to see them have. We have no idea what our children will face in their adult futures. Rote memorization won't really be much of an advantage for them. But creativity and the ability to problem-solve, that is what will be REAL tools we shouldn't be overlooking.

 "The things we fear most in organizations -- fluctuations, disturbances, imbalances -- are the primary sources of creativity." - Alfred North Whitehead

 "To live a creative life, we must lose our fear of being wrong." - Joseph Chilton Pierce

 "You can't use up creativity. The more you use, the more you have." - Maya Angelou

I'd love to start a collection of articles about creativity. If you have any you run across, would you consider putting them in the comment box here? I'd really appreciate it!

School or Home?

Should you Unschool/Homeschool or go ahead and send your child to school? Lots of parents struggle with which they want to do. I think if you sit and think about these 3 questions, then compare the school vs. home columns, you might get a clearer idea.

• Think about your own observations of school and the interactions that happen there.
• Think about how time is spent.
• Think about what a perfect school would look like? And then compare it to what is reality.

Go to School	Learn at Home
Confined in building from (roughly)  8 a.m. - 4 p.m. Moves from classroom to classroom, but rarely outside the building	Learning can take place at home or in the community
Children learn from 1-7 adults each day	Children learn from as many adults as needed for the material or experience to be adequately covered
If child and teacher do not get along or communicate well, they may be able to change midyear, but they must stay together until there is a system-wide “break."	If child and teacher do not communicate well and “teacher” is parent, they work it out. If “teacher” is outside tutor, guide, docent, director, parents have flexibility to change that person
Compulsory attendance laws vary from state to state but usually require a student be present at the school for a minimum of 180 days before advancing to the next grade.	“Compulsory Attendance” does not apply since the child lives there. The focus can be on LEARNING instead of simply ATTENDING.
Children stay with a particular class period for around 45 minutes, and change subjects about 6-7 times per day with curriculum predetermined by a school board appointed by the governor.	Learners that are interested in a particular topic can stay with that topic as long as they are interested.  Some families recognize that learning doesn’t really “stick” if they learner is not interested. Learners can learn more like adults learn outside of school, immersion in the topic with  the goal being mastery. Parents and children can together  determine the learning path.
If a child doesn't feel well, they should try to push through and go, unless they have a fever or are throwing up.	If a child doesn't feel well, parents recognize that they won't really absorb much that day. They can rest until they feel better, read a little in bed, drink fluids and get better.
Committees determine what the curriculum will be for ALL the children of the state. Politics plays a part since school boards are elected positions and the budget is met through taxes.	Parents and children can together determine the academic/educational path for the child.  Families can budget for learning expenses. Several families can band together to share costs. Libraries, used book stores, homeschool book fairs and resource sharing can be used.
Family outings or vacations must take place on weekends, holiday breaks, or in summer time. Unless child has summer school, then work around the school schedule. School schedule usually trumps family desires.	Family outings and vacations can be taken whenever the activity is available. Families only have to work with the parameters of the family's other commitments. - Families can choose times that are best suited for the activity   - Families can choose off-season times for better rates and less crowds
Children connecting with same age children is important. Relating to children in other grades is discouraged.  Relating to teachers is in an Authority: Student format Parents are encouraged not to interfere with the relationships the children have at school. This is seen as the child "learning to cope."	Spending time connecting for family members is important, as these relationships last throughout their lives.  Relating to others with similar interests is what matters - not the age. Relationships with adults in a child's life can be varied in format, not necessarily authoritarian style. Parents can easily see the relationships the child has with adults and other children, and adjustments as necessary to help these relationships be as successful as possible.
Physical activity occurs at set times each day, and in whatever form the curriculum has deemed appropriate.	Families can decide what physical activity to pursue. This is not a one-size -tits-all, but instead can be tailored to the individual need of the child
Fresh air: From the car to the building; loitering is discouraged.	Fresh Air: anytime you want it

A Hands-On Approach to Parenting

For years, we've heard other parents say, "A house full of teens? Good luck!" And they wander away shaking their head, as if you've already lost some battle. True, the teenage years are full of heightened emotions, raging hormones, self-esteem issues, and basically trying to figure out who they are in this world. These are tough issues! So, why, as a society, would we think we need to take a more hands-off approach to raising teens? These years seem to be much more difficult to figure out than those pre-school years, when we were so incredibly involved. But we try to deal with it in all black or white. Either we look away and hope for the best. Or we tighten the screws to keep them safe. 

Neither really work.

Sometimes, a lot of times really, parents are simply too tired to go head-to-head with our teen in angst. And, it's true that if you come back to it in a day or so, lots of the emotion will have blown away and it's easier to get through the day. But the issues are still just under the surface. This is a missed opportunity on so many levels.


Your teen could learn to face their problems head on. They could see that you are not afraid to go into these treacherous waters WITH them.  They could see you're not afraid to stand by them and face the scary stuff that they are facing each day. You could show them that you think their problems are important, even if they seem petty and small to you. They are obviously causing your teen some difficulties. You can let them know that they are important to you and helping them solve problems is part of the job of parenting.

You might have to bite your tongue. Teens want to be heard - who doesn't? They really want to come to the conclusion on their own. So asking questions is better than telling them what should be done. Even if you think you know. Helping them learn to problem-solve is the key. Not doing it for them.

Relating stories from when you had similar situations as a teen might help. Watch their expressions though. You might be really "getting into" your story of your own teen years, and they are tuning out. Not because your story is dull (I'm sure it's not!) but because the shift of the focus went from them to you. They are the one who is in the middle of a struggle. Keep your story brief. ;-)

So often, they think we cannot relate. Or they're afraid we're going to judge them. Or point out their mistakes. These are the pitfalls to avoid in these parent-teen interactions. While it may sound hokey, they need to know that you are coming from a place of love not worry - because worry implies you think they cannot handle themselves. But from love. You want them to be happy. You want to be their safe place they can run to when their friends stab them in the back. You want to be the one who will not betray them. They will come to trust you, share more with you, and value your input. Win-win.